Lotto-win exotica is all well and good, but how about the must-own cars for what's left of your life savings?
By PH Staff / Saturday, February 5, 2022 / Loading comments
Caterham R400, 2008, 26k, £29,990
This year marks a decade since my first Caterham experience. I was passenger with Heikki Kovalainen in the heady Caterham F1 days – yep, that long ago. He did some decent donuts around cones; I stalled a lot attempting the same. But the experience stuck – I’d never been in a car so loud and so raw. It was intoxicating, maybe thanks to the clutch fumes. I had to have another go.
Driving around corners rather than cones has proved, of course, even better. On road or track, come rain or shine, there isn’t a Caterham I’ve not loved. But there are some I have a deeper affinity for than others, which is how the bucket list spec has been arrived at, using more work hours than it probably should have. I want 180hp or more; Sevens are arguably better balanced with less, but that slightly overengined feel of the really fast ones is addictive. I want six gears, a narrow body, a funky colour and small wheels. Roller barrel throttle bodies, too, if I’m being picky. Told you some time went into it.
This one is just about perfect. I love Riviera Blue, the 620R nose looks cool, 220hp from the 2.0-litre Duratec is a bit too much (so actually just right) and almost all the options I’d want are fitted – the throttle bodies can wait for another day. The mileage is fine, it’s known to the dealer, and just sneaks in below £30k as well. Which feels like a realistic aim, one day at least. Assuming we’re still allowed to drive Sevens by then! MB
Jaguar XE SV Project 8, 2020, 2k, £117,990
Surprisingly tough to pick a single bucket car based on past experience. Very easy to inflate the reputation of something you drove for half a day, on deserted roads adjacent to a Scottish loch. Feels like a recipe for longer-term disappointment. So I’ve gone for one I’ve never driven instead. The Jaguar XE SV Project 8 is perfect in several ways, not least because it is not even pretending to make a rational argument for itself. JLR built it mainly to show off what it could do on the Nurburgring with the gloves off.
Truth be told, most buyers would likely have preferred it if Jaguar had kept the gloves on and simply built an R-badged XE at an accessible price. But the strategists nixed that idea, and instead we got 300 examples of what is essentially a marketing exercise. But what an exercise: SVO started with an unprecedented 600hp and 516lb ft of torque from the 5.0-litre supercharged V8, and finished with a completely reworked peach of a chassis. In the weighty four-door saloon category, there is nothing to touch it on track. Or so I’ve heard.
Those are the obvious reasons for owning a Project 8. The less obvious reasoning is to do with money. Because for a long while now the model has been helpfully bucking the universal trend for near-vertical appreciation. It was £150k when new; secondhand, this one, which is barely run-in, can be had for under £120k. If it keeps going at this rate, it might be halfway affordable by the time I retire. Let’s just hope not everyone notices in the meantime that it’ll likely stand as one of the final petrol-burning testaments to Jaguar’s swashbuckling past. NC
Lotus Elise Cup 250, 2017, 11k, £49,995
It’s a good thing that Lotus didn’t used to qualify punters before sending stuff out, as I almost certainly wouldn’t have received the Elise brochure I requested back in school. I pored over that thing for hours. More than a decade later, I finally bought that yellow 111S I’d been dreaming of for so long. And now, 20 years on from receiving my first Lotus brochure, the one I’m obsessing over is the Series 3 Elise.
I had an excuse to borrow one for a weekend when we featured a Cup 250 in our icon display at the 2019 Silverstone Classic, and it quickly knocked a V8 R8 off the top of my bucket list for the car I want to own before I’m 40. To these eyes, it looks perfect from every angle, which is not something that can be said for a lot of newer cars these days.
The way it drives is mesmerising – some will prefer the V6 Exige for £50k, but for sensible power that you can use on the road and feel every one of those 250 horsepower, there’s nothing else I’ve driven that has left such a lasting memory. Now all that’s left is re-mortgaging my house without my wife noticing so that I can buy one… BL
BMW M2 Competition, 2020, 15k, £43,450
A realistic bucket list car, they said. Honestly. If I’ve got to imagine what make and model I’d turn up to the pearly gates in, it would be a Ferrari F40 thank you very much and keep the change. But they insisted so I dutifully reached for the shortlist marked ‘cars I’d like to own’. Except it isn’t short. It is a neverending story. Which to choose?
Well, in the real world I’m refusing to accept current asking prices; they’re playing havoc with my man maths. But there’s no playing the waiting game with an editorial team breathing down your neck, so, hand duly forced, I’ve gone for, somewhat predictably, an M2. As a BMW fan it ticks every box, and comes with the added attraction of not being valued like a Renaissance oil painting.
I’ve apparently already missed the boat on a decent sub-£30k standard M2, so why not go all out on a more powerful Competition? The black, on black, on black may not be to everyone’s taste, but I like it; I also like the 15k miles and the spec (yes, sorry purists, including DCT). Prices do appear to be holding strong; perhaps I can make the sums work, if I have it for just six months and move on again, avoiding a big loss… but I’m not sure I could get rid. Guess that wouldn’t matter if I’ve actually kicked the bucket. SL
Lotus Esprit V8 SE, 2003, 19k, £64,995
Coming in at the pricier end of the spectrum (excluding the supremely optimistic Jag) is my choice: the Lotus Esprit V8 SE. With that glorious wedge shape stamped into pop culture history by the late Roger Moore, and topped off by the striking rear wing and a laser blue and cream leather colour scheme, I couldn’t help myself.
Now I must confess, whilst I’ve never had the pleasure of driving an Esprit, I’ve read the reviews, spent many hours piloting one in Need for Speed II, and have certainly yearned for one from behind a television screen long enough to stand firmly by my choice. Plus, this is a bucket list pick after all. On the road, I understand that you can expect blistering performance and spectacular handling, with only the aural experience lagging behind. Frankly, that just sounds like an opportunity to explore aftermarket exhausts to me.
This one ticks all the boxes: a late V8 with few miles, not many owners, stunning condition… I’d better stop now as I’m dangerously close to exploring ill-advised financing options. And frankly, living in London I probably couldn’t afford to park, insure, drive, or service it anyway. Ah well, one day… AF
Porsche 911 Carrera 2, 2000, 95k, £21,995
A Porsche 911 Carrera 2 doesn’t sound that bucket-listy, does it. It’s the kind of car most people could pop out and buy without a second thought. Not me. That’s because all my cash – spare, day-to-day and, indeed, ill-gotten – is currently being swallowed up by a house refurb. Watch Tom Hanks in The Money Pit and you’ll get the idea. So I cannot justify one now and I am worried that, by the time I’m solvent again, they’ll have rocketed up another ten grand.
Why a 996? Well, as I’ve said a few times now, it’s the first 911 I drove that felt properly sorted – not just from a driving point of view but to sit in and use every day. The driving position is spot on, and you don’t need to be Alan Turing to understand the ergonomics. You could argue that the 997 is even better to drive, which it is, and better looking, too, but I like the 996 not only because it’s the cheapest of the breed, but because I think it’s got better looking with age. Yes, the fried eggs are an acquired taste, but I genuinely think the rear end is the best resolved of all the whole 911 lineage.
And to drive, even the early 3.4-litre cars like this are easily fast enough. They handle beautifully and even though traction control was a rarity that doesn’t matter – it’s a 911, so traction is never an issue. I’ve also heard that some of them are ULEZ compliant, which is a bonus for living in London. And probably another reason they’ll shoot up and remain on my bucket list, instead of on my drive. JH
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